Fellow Travellers: Discovering the True Self Through Love

During the period of the 'Lavender Scare' and 'Red Scare', even a slight connection to communism or homosexuality was enough to raise suspicion or risk banishment from government offices. It was a time of utter fear and discrimination, leaving a permanent stain on the queer history. Enter "Fellow Travellers," a show that delves into the complexities of that time, shedding light on the challenges faced by government officials. Not only does it deal with queerness, but it also illuminates the dual struggles of the black community, grappling with racism amidst unofficial segregation. The story unravels as the characters strive to find their identity, confront racism, navigate societal challenges and, above all, come to terms with their own identity.

The main characters, Hawk and Tim, I believe, symbolize the contrasting facets of the queer community of that tumultuous time; one - represented by Tim- who wanted to be unapologetically himself despite the societal judgement, and another -represented by Hawk- who was fearful or rather in denial of his sexuality; to whom the opinion of the society mattered the most. There existed no clear right and wrong at that time because each navigated the situations with varying stakes.  For instance, Hawk, a high-ranking official and a war hero, was also directly associated with Mr Smith -the leader of the opposition- which bestowed upon him added responsibilities and risks, whereas Tim was young and unaffiliated with any high government official; evading any harsh consequences. Their backgrounds highlight their motives and fears, shaping their decisions during that turbulent era.

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One intriguing aspect of their relationship was their dynamics. Although Tim comes off as more naive and submissive initially, over time it becomes evident that he possesses a strength that is beyond Hawk as he displays his courage by quitting his job adhering his principles and coming out in front of his family and friends which adds a nuanced layer to his character. On the other hand, Hawk may have appeared as the dominant, stronger and more clever of the two, yet he struggled to reveal his true self till the very end of the show. The two had contrasting personalities, coupled with unpredictable traits which further added more depth to their characters.

Another fascinating facet of their story was their beliefs. Although Hawk was an atheist, he did believe in Mr. Smith and his ideologies and never, for once, did he faze or change. Conversely, Tim sacrificed his whole belief system to be with Hawk. He put his love for Hawk in the highest regard which both distanced him from and brought him closer to divine power. The portrayal of this was shown through Tim's regular visits to the Church where he sought to confess his perceived sins to become closer to God, yet he could never comprehend how his love can be considered sin. In one way,  his regular visits created a distance between him and God as he grappled with guilt and confusion, on the other, he realized that his love for Hawk was itself a manifestation of divine power, leading him to question the existing interpretations of sin and morality.

                          

Moreover, Tim had always been a source of comfort for Hawk, offering him a haven of sanity and stability through his warmth and unconditional love. He served as a beacon, guiding Hawk through the darkest times whether it was grappling with his son's demise or his faltering relationship with his wife, Tim remained a constant source of unwavering support.  But Hawk struggled to reciprocate the love openly, the reason being fear -fear of being caught in vulnerability- and unacceptance towards his own identity. Till the end, Tim wanted Hawk to seek love, if not with Tim than with his family; the sheer selflessness really puts love in perspective. 

'Fellow Travellers' is a story which not only illuminates the trials of life but also celebrates the beauty of love and selflessness. It reminds us that being loved brings immense joy, but the act of giving love without any expectation of reciprocity is an expression of love that transcends the ordinary. Tim and Hawk's story serves as a compelling testament that urges us not to fear embracing our feelings and expressing them openly, for time is precious and a finite source, that needs to be valued.